Weston's Mark Cox shares how to tackle Horsetail

I believed that ‘The Day of the Triffids’ was a work of fiction – that was until I saw with my own eyes the shocking truth. “Triffids are real and very much alive. So far they have consumed three quarters of my garden and very possibly Wendy, my neighbour’s wife.”

Within a few minutes of reading this email I had packed my bags, made a flask of tea, grabbed a pack of Wagon Wheels and wrote a letter to my wife telling her I loved her just in case I didn’t make it home, before setting off.

When I arrived, the police and emergency services where already on site and I could see Huw Edward interviewing a man who I found out later was Bill about his wife Wendy’s disappearance for the six o’clock news.

With an impending sense of dread I was led through a series of white plastic tents and tunnels until finally I was there standing in the garden in a full ET The Extra Terrestrial chemical suit...

Once there it was obvious to me that this was a severe Equisetum Arvense (Horsetail or Mares tail) attack.

Horsetail is a deep rooted perennial weed that spreads by spores in the spring, it can traverse large distances and its roots can reach seven feet in depth. The plant has evolved to accumulate silica from the soil and this mutation contributes to its herbicidal resistance.

Roger, a fellow gardener who was also on site, suggested covering the affected areas with a weed blocking membrane. “It won’t work,” I said. “All you’ll do is force the weed towards the edges of the membrane where it will continue to thrive.”

I knew it would take a long time to get the infestation under control, years in fact. A chemical treatment for the Horsetail weed is available such as SBK, Glyphosate and products containing Pelargonic acid.

However, in order for the treatment to work, there must be a large enough green surface area for the chemical to be absorbed. Spraying the weed if it’s less than 20cm tall will have no effect as not enough of the treatment will penetrate the plant.

Fortunately, Shirley’s Horsetail weeds were 50cm tall; finally we had caught a break. I instructed Roger and the other expert gardeners to start trampling the weeds under foot. Damaging the structure of the plant would help the chemical treatment be fully absorbed.

The garden would need a further treatment in October to coincide with the natural dying back cycle of the plant.

A chemical spray at this point would be transported deep down into the root structure, but this alone would not get Shirley out of the woods. Inevitably we’d have to return next year to tackle the menace once more.

I needed to sit down. I was exhausted so I went to open my thermos flask, when I heard a creaking noise coming from the garden shed behind me. Tentatively I opened the shed door only to find Wendy in a state of undress with Shirley’s husband Dave. Obviously they had huddled together for survival. I offered them a restorative Wagon Wheel but they declined. It’s funny really because when I went back later in the year Dave was living in the shed. I’ve put it down to post traumatic stress!